STL concert cancelled because of pigeon sh#t

Kings of Leon, which is a band (apologies to fans for not having heard of them) canceled a concert in St Louis because of pigeon shit… The Riverfront Times reports

After the Nashville band finished “Taper Jean Girl,” the third song of the set, it walked off stage. According to Hardy, the house lights stayed off for a short while and then went up, and then someone came to the stage and said that “due to concerns over the band’s safety, we are canceling the show. Please file out in an orderly fashion.” RFT photographer Erin Kinsella estimated it was “3 to 5 minutes after the stage went dark” that they made the announcement. She also noted that security was then beefed up near the stage.

Adds Hardy: “Everyone was convinced it was a hoax.”

Mass confusion ensued. The crowd started booing and chanting, “Bullshit!”; Hardy said the parking lot was full of honking horns and the sound of bottles being broken.

The official @rftmusic Twitter got hit with outrageous outrage and points of blame toward “pigeons.” Kings of Leon drummer Nathan Followill tweeted the following:

@doctorfollowill So sorry St. Louis. We had to bail, pigeons shitting in jareds mouth. Too unsanitary to continue.

@doctorfollowill Don’t take it out on Jared, it’s the fucking venues fault. You may enjoy being shit on but we don’t. Sorry for all who traveled many miles.

The RFT translates that that means a pigeon shit in bassist Jared Followill’s mouth. Richard translates that that aint no pigeon shit, thaz some bullshit. If in fact a bird crapped on a band member who happened to be in a position where the excrement entered his mouth, that is pretty gross, but wtf happened to “the show must go on”? You dont have to “like” being shit on to power through an uncomfortable situation in an outdoor theater. thats weaksauce, bro.

Giant poop bubbles plague Indiana neighbors

Giant house-sized poop bubbles are growing and becoming dangerous in the “waste lagoons” at a dairy farm in Winchester, Indiana. When I think of a lagoon, I think tropical, I think Gilligans Island. Way to ruin that word by informing me that there are such things as open air cow shit “lagoons”, Wall Street Journal… The giant bubbles are made from a plastic lining that was supposed to stay at the bottom of the damn thing but something clearly went wrong and now they are filling with gas from all the poop that got underneath it. Nearby houses are annoyed/terrified that volatile shit bubbles are in their back yard. If one were to pop, the explosion could destroy millions. Actually, I made that up, but they DO allude to danger if they pop. All I can think about is getting a gun and shooting them just to see what horrible shit-boom occurs.

Well, the fun is over and the problem is solved I guess. NY Mag reports that the bubbles have deflated like “raisins in the sun” which sounds impossible, or at least extremely rare. Kinda like toasting toast – you toast bread and you put grapes in the sun to turn them into raisins. Toasting toast and shrinking a raisin in the sun? no thanks.

My first idea was that this looks like a perfect source of green energy and got angry at the double fail that this isn’t already done everywhere. Every dairy farm everywhere should be harvesting the methane gas from their livestock into energy. wtf guys?? I was disappointed when I saw someone else make this suggestion on the WSJ’s comments, but still wonder why its not friggin happening.

When life gives you lemons – make poop bubbles that can pay the electric bills.