As ridiculously cute as this viral video is, it kindov hurts my feelings to watch.
This kid went fishing and is so fascinated by one of the fish that he wants to keep it as a toy. That part is hilarious, but I found it heartbreaking to watch him unravel as he sees himself losing the appeal and not understanding why.
Obviously this had to be milked for at least a little while by the adults for the comedy gold, and I totally support that, but I wish they would have then explained a better reason for the “no” verdict on why he can’t put the dead fish in his toy box and keep it as a toy. My fantasy version of this is that after the camera was turned off, he got a full scientific explanation of the decomposition of organic matter to make him understand that the cool thing he’s holding now will not stay that way, making him accept through realization that he’s not being arbitrarily denied a reasonable request but rather that his intentions are simply unfeasible.
I heard someone on a podcast reference this “Wonderama with Bob McAllister” thing and I looked it up. What I found was oddly fascinating.
If you feel like ingesting an 8 minute sample of children’s programming from another time (at least a decade before me, since one of the questions is “who is the president” and the answer is Nixon and he was prez from 1960-1974), check it out in this Snake-in-a-can game segment. It seems like a lot of time-filler just to occupy groups of kids with working moms. Or something. Every can appears to have a snake, even though it felt like to me that the host was implying its not certain that there are any inside. After you get the snakes, you get a chance to win the prize for that can if you can answer a question on sports, entertainment or government.
No other TV game held quite the thrill and suspense of Snake-In-A-Can. Wonderama aired on weekends in NY on WNEW-TV. It started out as a six-hour show, later shrinking to an equally unreasonable four hours. Two-to-three of these hours were shots of kids waving their arms; the rest of the program had exciting games like this one, where many contestants were too short to be seen. But Bob McAllister was really great with the kids – just watch!
This little girl went on to grow up to be Michelle Obama. or something.
Camille Boivin and Philippe Aumond are a Canadian couple who drove 9 hours to get matching tattoos. Sounds stupid. Oh, but they did it to honor their 5 year old son… sounds even dumber if you ask me… Oh – but there’s more…
Their son Jacob has a cellphone in his lunchbox. Geez. at only 5? Don’t you think that’s a bit excessive? Well, it’s used for calling phone every day to calculate and program his insulin pump so it delivers the exact amount he needs based on his food intake. Jacob thought it was a cool gadget at first until he realized he was the only one at school who had it and that made him different and weird.
Jacob has to wear the pump at all times. Round the clock. His pancreas stopped functioning and needs the pump to deliver five insulin injections a day to survive.
His parents say they didn’t want Jacob to feel he was different from others so, in solidarity, they got matching tattoos. Of Jacobs pump. that say “forever linked together,” meaning to the pump and to each other. Heart melting yet?
Jacob was thrilled to get his pump in August 2010. He saw it as a personal machine that works for him, Boivin said. Then he wondered whether he was the only boy in the world to wear one.
“It broke my heart,” Boivin recalled. She told him all children have their differences, some wear glasses, others have braces or wheelchairs. There was one other adolescent in their region with a pump, but no one his age that reflected his situation.
While Boivin and Aumond couldn’t get real insulin pumps, they figured an ink version would help assuage their son’s solitude.
It had to be esthetic and look like the real thing, Boivin said, so the couple searched on the Internet for an artist and found Bruno Oeuvray in Joliette.
“Jacob was thrilled. It was magical to see his eyes,” Boivin said, her voice wavering with emotion. “Even today I have tears in my eyes.”
Aumond’s tattoo has barbed wire string where the catheter would be attached to the pump, a visual reminder of painful injections and “having to pierce the skin several times of day for a drop of blood” that the condition imposes on patients. Boivin’s tattoo catheter trails to her back where it transforms into an almond-tree branch with pink flowers.
“It’s a symbol of hope for a cure one day,” Boivin said of the almond blooms.
Earlier this week, a YouTube video surfaced from The World of Dance competition in which a group of young — and I mean really young — girls wearing midriff-baring tops, short skirts and black stockings dance to Beyonce’s ‘Single Ladies.’ The dance troupe, called Precision Dance, hails from Orange County, and definitely “put a ring on it” during the competition in Pomona on April 10.
I clicked on this expecting a horrifying and heart breaking sexualization of children that will seriously mess with their heads, send horrible messages to the rest of society and generally add another block to a counter-culture wall that can only end badly. then it started and I was like “oh, its not that bad”. then i got a better look at the stripper outfits and went back to the “this is awful” position. but then when you see that there’s actual talent here – and there is – you just get confused. By way of talent and pizazz, these kids are friggin, not, playing. dayum.
So then my position on it becomes annoyance that the parents responsible for this allowed the controversy to happen at all. who the fuck thought these costumes were a good idea? you ruined it. fail. stupid. wtf moron. you have kids who can rock a dance move to a contemporary song that ya, might get some scrutiny over the bumping and gyrating but its not overt and there isn’t anything clearly with sexual intent so fine – but why.the.fkk. did you put them in Vegas showgirl costumes? why did you turn an otherwise awesome and adorable performance into a pedophile spank session? You are an idiot.
Looking for answers, I found that the parents had in fact responded to the controversy over the video:
Melissa Presch, the mom of one little dancer and Cory Miller, the father of another child in the group spoke to Inside Edition about the controversy. “I’m shocked, quite frankly, that people would suggest such things and say such things about 8 and 9 year old girls,” said Melissa Presch claiming the girls got their moves from the ‘Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel’ movie — not Beyonce’s music video.
Then why weren’t the girls wearing Chipmunk costumes, yeh dummy? You can’t play the innocent-dance-move-origins card if you’re going to dress your child performers like burlesque dancers? Wtf, brah. Just because the dance moves were allegedly in a PG kids movie doesn’t mean they are automatically appropriate, but in this case she’s right. the dance moves aren’t inherently suggestive. but the costumes are, you dumb whore. when you’re wearing tassels and short shorts and tops, ANY hip movement in any direction is going to have sexual connotations.
The stupidity of this woman in her super-serious pseudo-SHOCK that others “would say such things about 8 and 9 year old girls” is a dosage of obnoxious that could produce enough vomit to feed a dozen dogs for a dozen days. The idiot father who similarly brushes off the charges of sexualization as “nah, when you look at it as a father, you’re just proud of your kids” is a level of WTF that would make even Japan say WTF – and Japan is the epicenter of WTF.
Dude: its about presentation. ya, thats great that you’re not getting a boner over your daughters stripper routine – we’re all very proud of you – but why are you not the least bit concerned about her being pedophile bait? Not “jailbait” – which is a post-puberty young adult below the age of 18 – PED-O-PHILE-BAAAIT. God you’re so gross.“She doesn’t really know what she’s doing” is not a justification any more than the guy who told Cartman he could get a ton of free Sea Monkeys if he just closed his eyes and sucked through a tube. he goes on to say “even certain parts of the dance weren’t even choreographed to be [soft core porn]”.
thanks dad. great to know.
Such a waste.
Final Thought: as frighteningly nutballs it is that that parents are this willfully blind and as unfortunate it is that these talented kids had to have an otherwise kick-ass performance get ruined by the taint of skankdom – at least it is a safe bet that the ones that grow up to be hot in 7-10 years will be preconditioned to have low inhibitions and will be unprotected by watchful parents. so. at least there’s that…
In Soviet Russia, light bathes you… Make-believe summer lasts for a minute or two as kindergarten children in sunless Lovozero bathe in ultraviolet light. Brief exposure to UV radiation provides the children with vitamin D, normally supplied by sunlight. The “sunshine vitamin” strengthens young bones.
Everyone is excited for the Where The Wild Things Are movie, and it will be interesting no doubt, but the original books popularity is built on a mountain of slave labor. There is nothing intrinsically special, unique or even good about the text of the book. It’s only 9 sentences for Christ sake – how good can 9 sentences be even when at the most scholarly and brilliant? The books popularity comes 100% from the illustrations. We all liked the book for the same reason we liked Dr Seuss: the ILLUSTRATIONS. Every Charlie Brown cartoon was nothing special either. We love the Peanuts specials for the music and we love Wild Things for the pictures. lets be honest.
UPDATE: completely vindicated. Adam Carolla proves my point by going through this shitfest line by line…