OMFG!! I can’t believe how big Oprah’s gotten!

oprah.chimpanzeevictim

Horror of horrors… When they said this lady had her face ripped off by that chimpanzee, they meant she had her FACE. ripped, fkking, OFF. ug.. awful times a million.

Had to remove her eyes due to infection, no nose, no hands.and all because Travis the chimp felt threatened by a middle aged woman just standing there, so he naturally had to incapacitate her.

and to top it all off, Oprah has ballooned back up to previous overweightness.

Artie Lange on The Big Idea with Donny Deutsch

Artie Lange has ballooned and disgustified, but is as funny as ever as he sits down with Donny Deutsch to talk about his ongoing drug problem. His dry “i hate myself and life” delivery is great, mostly because its true.

Exit question: is Donny being a douche? Did you get the “i’m not joking with you, im making fun of you and will exploit your you as a spectacle similarly to the Chris Farley trap we talked about where im not joining in your good humored self deprecation but am really just looking down on you as a big fat drugged out clown” vibe? or no?…

“stay healthy… after i just had you eat cupcakes and soda on the air”… myea