Ever since I heard Nellie, the Filipino mother of my older friend JohnJohn, explain to me that Pee Wee Herman got arrested because he “got caught wiggling his weenie in public” (to which JohnJohn scolded her for using such graphic language), I was outraged not at the arrest but at the lack of defense by Pee Wee. An explanation at LEAST, please. but no. no word from the Herman camp.
Now, finally: Paul Reubens Defends His Public Masturbation Arrest to Playboy.
(PeeWee with Tim Burton)
Reubans says on his defense:
“Had we gone to trial, we had ready an expert from the Masters and Johnson Institute who was going to testify that in 30 years of research on masturbation the institute had never found one person who masturbated with his or her non-dominant hand,”… “I’m right-handed, and the police report said I was jerking off with my left hand. That would have been the end of the case right there, proof it couldn’t have been me.”
On the late night comedians making fun of his arrest:
I get that it’s their job, but I had already said the allegations weren’t true and felt I deserved the benefit of the doubt from them. Make a joke about me but also just say, ‘By the way, he’s been a friend of our show for many years.’ I was shocked people would kick me when I was down.”
And then he tells this amusing story of embarrassment:
Two years ago I was on a flight back to L.A. from the East Coast and it was one of those newer planes where every seat is equipped with its own little live satellite television screen. … I look over to the bulkhead one row in front of me, and I see a TV monitor there showing my mug shot, which then morphs into a picture of Pee-wee,” Reubens added. “And I realize, ‘Oh my God, they’re showing my E! True Hollywood Story—live!—to every seat in this airplane.’ I felt as though I was going to have to jump off the plane.”
Poor Pee Wee. 🙁