The “I’m a Mac / and I’m a PC” line of commercials from Apple that mocked the abilities and performance of Microsoft Windows software and the Personal Computers that ran them.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHgKu81Tv9A
The criticisms were exhibited in amusing, memorable, and effective ways, so it was smart for Intel – recently dropped as a processor chip partner from Apple – to hire the “I’m a Mac” actor Justin Long for their own series of ads titled “Justin Gets Real” throwing shade at Apple and it’s custom M1 processors. Intel says laptops powered by Intel processors are better.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gtRRMd2_UI
Other ads in the series have Long dunking on Apple’s lack of touchscreen Macs, the inability to plug more than one external display into M1 Macs (what? why is that a thing?), and a variety of different options available for laptops powered by Intel.
It’s all clever marketing, but dang Justin – where’s your loyalty at? In 2017, the actor starred in a series of Huawei commercials promoting the company’s Mate 9 smartphone. Meanwhile, the “I’m a PC” actor – who I met at LAX baggage claim in 2009 – has ironically stuck with Apple, appearing as a “one more thing” goof in 2020’s Apple MacBook announcement event:
Apples design choices amount to “we are whatever the other guys aren’t”.
That’s a line I say a little further down in this post but I wanted to do that thing where a pull-quote is used to demonstrate a thesis cuz that’s what real journalism is, or something.
The logo for their September product announcement event appears to be a stack of clear colored plastic shells.
So does this mean they are bringing back color – or, sorry, “flavor” – options to their computers like the early 2000’s iMac and iBook options?
I’m gonna say that will be a solid no because Apples design choices amount to “we are whatever the other guys aren’t”.
So the first Apple computer debut’s as a beige square and later a beige monitor with a beige tower connected to it and their first laptops came in off-white and then off-black (or what Apple today calls “Space Gray”) – but then when every desktop maker offered nothing but a beige tower or black laptop, they come out with “flavors” of computers that include color options that are bright and zesty and intentionally absent of white, off-white, beige/tan/whatever available choices in desktop and black options for laptops taken away.
But then when the other computer makers catch up and start making fun looking colorful desktop and laptop options, Apple says “fkk-you” and makes all their machines in unpainted uniform aluminum.
The same with iPhones: They were black when most cell phones were silver, became silver when most cell phones started copying the black iPhone, and expanded into colorful options only after the industry standard for smart phones were “either silver or black”.
Apple is what the others aren’t – or at least that’s how the company wants people to think of their products. So what they offer is shaped by what the standard is and then Apple will go do the opposite.
Apple Card a credit card with no fees and the sort of spending tracking that a dozen other apps offer. It’s a partnership with Goldman Sachs and MasterCard.
Apple Arcade a paid subscription service (price not announced) that gives you an all-you-can-eat style access to a list of premium and paid games on the app store.
Apple News+ a subscription service for digital versions of newspapers and magazines.
and…
The Big Announcement!: An unexciting mainstream version of what is already available to consumers with no advantageous features or innovation
Apple TV+
The main attraction! And what is it?… It’s an app.
It contains Apple Channels which does what Amazon Channels service and Hulu both do. But now its by Apple!
This is like how early DVD’s would try to stretch out their non-existent “Special Features” with checks like “chapter selection” and “dolby digital audio”
In addition to the ability to buy channels through Apple, there will also be original programming at a subscription price that was conspicuously absent from the event… Whatever that price is, will it be worth it? Here’s what we were given to make that determination:
The Original Programming on the debut of Apple TV+ is a snooze-fest
The shows in this announcement are nothing special. That doesn’t mean any of them will be bad – it just means they’re not exciting.
Stephen Spielberg’s Amazing Stories… basically another Twilight Zone style anthology “but with SPIELBERG!”…
The Morning Show… A Comedy(?) or Drama(?) or Both about a Morning Show… Reese Witherspoon & Jennifer Aniston & Steve Carell do a show about a morning talk show. No clues as to what kind of show it is except the painfully unfunny “oh, hey guys, am I late??” bit that ushered in Steve Carell to the presentation stage after Aniston and Witherspoon had said a few words about their involvement in the series. That clue suggests that the show is a comedy but who the hell knows. There was no detail about it. We don’t know if this is going to be a goofy reboot along the lines of Back To You (a show that barely lasted 1 season, literally no one knows about, and I’m only mentioning here because I kindasorta almost got a speaking role on it) or if they are going for more of an Alan Sorkin tone like HBO’s The Newsroom. Probably the latter, but only because that’s a safer route to take and Apples other lineup items look equally bland and pedestrian.
Something about Immigrants… I guess its a docu-series? The Indian fella from HBO’s Silicon Valley (Kumail Nanjiani) introduced it but what exactly his role in the series is wasn’t made clear. I guess he hosts explorations into immigrant-centric human interest tales or something? Whatever it is – this was the peak of his career as his dramatically lighted face recieved equal billing with Spielberg, Anniston/Witherspoon, Big Bird, and frigginOprah, so good for him at least even if the show looks uninteresting.
A Sesame Street Spinoff… This segment was so horrible and so indicative of everything wrong with this event that I had to spin it off into its own post about how awful it was…
A Science Fiction drama about blind people… Jason Mamoa stars in series that is a new spin on the essential concept of “A Quiet Place” in where a tribe of people live in a dystopian future where a handicap is the central driving plot contrivance.
Little Voice… I have no idea what this is but director J.J. Abrams pitched it alongside a singer-songwriter I’m not familiar with named Sara Bareilles. Are you excited yet?
2 Oprah Documentaries… one about sexual harassment, and one about I-already-forgot-cuz-no-one-cares.
Any of these sound like must-see-TV to you?…
The entire Event was among Apple’s most dull ever
Product announcement events for tech companies aren’t expected to be entertainment. Except Apple’s. They decidedly are supposed to be exactly that.
How terribly, painfully, cringe-ily ironic that *this* – an announcement of a video entertainment service – of all Apple’s events, would be it’s most boring.
Chris Evans and Michelle Dockery, who will star in the limited series Defending Jacob, that wasn’t even talked about at the event (or if it was, it was so brief a mention that I didn’t notice), sum up the excitement level of the event perfectly in this GIF:
the face you make when you’re contractually obligated to be someplace that suuuuuuuuuucks...
^That’s at an applause moment, mind you… and they look like they’re at a school assembly having to humor a motivational anti-drugs speaker who is doing zero to change your opinion but you don’t want to make it any more awkward than it already is.
It didn’t need to be like this…
The absolute bone dryness of this event was an unforced error. At Apples 2017 product announcement event, they kicked off with a cold-open presentation of a funny, fast paced, inventive, high-budget comedy sketch depicting how civilization would collapse without any apps. It was legitimately entertaining, fast paced, and took some risks in the places it was willing to go to dredge for comedy in just a short little bit that was exciting and made people want to watch again and show other people who didn’t see it.
That event announced the new/upcoming iPhone X, an Apple Watch with cellular connectivity, and the Apple TV box finally getting 4K capability.
So… if Apple kicked off a presentation of routine hardware upgrades with a such a high-end, high-concept, pizazzy video, you can only imagine what kind of epic excitement stirrer they cooked up for an event that announces their streaming Hollywood style video service… except you can’t imagine it… because you would never in a hundred thousand years guess that this trillion dollar company entering the entertainment video space would ever ever ever make such a bizarrely wooden, nerdy, socially awkward, WTF choice of an opening for such a release…
This Apple event opened with… I kid you not… a slideshow… (which is bad enough, but hold on – it gets so much worse) that led a discussion of CEO Tim Cook lecturing about what a “Service” is… conceptually, and philosophically….
The first Apple Presentation on the new Apple Campus unveiling the companys new products suffered a bad moment on it’s keynote item and its main feature, but contrary to the initial reports, Face ID on the device didn’t fail. More importantly (to me) – the way the initial flub was handled on stage was a moment of honor.
The big announcement at the 2017 Apple event was the iPhone X (pronounced “ten”, not the letter “X”), which is an iPhone 8 that doesn’t have a fingerprint scanner and instead has a borderless screen and a face-scanner that will let you unlock your phone by looking at it. Apple headed off concerns about this technology in the announcement itself, assuring the public that the scanner will still work with hats, sunglasses, and facial modifications (like if you grow a beard). In what appears to be a nod to the news stories about people fooling iPhone fingerprint scans with high resolution photos, Apple also assured that their face ID technology has been tested against masks and molds of your face (so a Donald Trump halloween costume won’t be able to unlock the Presidential iPhone X, in other words).
This all led up to an unfortunate moment in the presentation when it came time for the world to see the feature work in real life for the first time, and the first attempt didn’t work, forcing the presenter on stage to have to use the backup iPhone.
Right away, news stories came pouring in that “face recognition failed” in the first demo attempt – which was what appeared to happen when the announcement was made that unlocking the phone is as easy as looking at it, and instead of a magical unlocking of the device, the keypad login page was what was thrown up on the giant screen.
I felt bad for Craig Federighi, the presenter on stage who handled what no doubt must have been a terrifying situation just fine and the phone actually worked exactly as designed as it turns out. The failure was in the phones setup, not in the facial recognition feature. The reason the “Enter Passcode” screen came on when Federighi performed his look-to-unlock move was reportedly that others who are not Federighi had their face scanned by the phone during rehearsals for the presentation – thus counting those scans in the iPhones memory as attempted logins by faces other than the phones owner – and what happens to any iPhone after repeated failed attempts to unlock by body part (which up until now has been by fingerprint)? – The device forces you to log in with the keypad.
So all that sucks for Federighi and Apple because it’s a brand new feature, the first time it’s even announced, it’s big debut to the world, announced in the presentation script with the instruction of “Unlocking it is as easy as looking at it and swiping up” and then doing precisely not-that. That’s the most awkward part of showcasing technology whether it’s to your friends showing them something cool only to have an app fail or whether you’re alone in a room and ask my phone a question by saying “Hey Siri” only to be met with silence because the “Hey Siri” feature doesn’t work when the device is in low battery mode. This effect on stage in front of a thousand people and on the worlds stage streaming live in front of millions can make a guy pee a little. But Federighi was a case study in how to handle such a situation:
HE STAYED CALM & CARRIED ON
When something unexpected in any kind of performance happens, the instinct is to stop performing. You can’t. “The show must go on” is a cliche for a reason. Stopping things to bring attention to the problem that is road-blocking you is an impulse because it feels safer because you are sharing the burden of the roadblock with the collective instead of shouldering the entirety of that pressure in ways that are likely to make you, instead of the situation look bad – but you still must resist. Imagine that roadblock analogy is literal and your’e leading a group in a tour bus the vision of the road is such so that all eyes are on you but only you can clearly see the road ahead – and the bus stops because of a literal roadblock. As you start to feel the pressure of the eyes that are on you, you might want to give a “wuuuh-ohhh, whats goin on?” response to signal to everyone that you’re the cause, something unplanned is happening, but it will be okay because you’re guiding them through it. This would make *you* feel better in that moment, but would make the company you’re working for look bad. Instead of commenting and stopping your presentation – you should smoothly keep your tone the same as you check with the driver and what is ahead and react accordingly, whether that is a calm statement about a half hour delay or a reassurance that you’ll only be stopped for just a minute – making your REAL reassurance not through your words but through your tone as you carry on, carry on, carry-TF-on.
Federighi did exactly this. His script said that looking at the phone is as easy as unlocking it and the phone didn’t unlock, so without any big “WUH OHH! HOOOOLD ON JUST A SECOND… UHHHHH” showstopping nervousness, he simply flipped the phone back down away from his face real quick to press the sleep button, filling the dead audio space with “and, you know…” so that the final presentation would have been barely a hiccup as he says “Unlocking the phone is as easy as looking at it [presented with keypad] – and, you know [awakens the phone and Face-ID scans again] – you’re logged right in. Unfortunately, it failed a second time.
HE DIDN’T MAKE AN “OOPS” FACE
The natural reaction to an unexpected error or roadblock in your actions while in front of an audience is broadcast this physically with a facial expression that signals “wups” to your audience. The reason for this is that it relieves the pressure in that moment that to you feels like an eternity where you appear incompetent and your brain wants to cut that snake off at the head before that look of incompetence spreads and dooms your entire presentation and you as a person extenuating from that experience. In the same way that saying “uh” and “um” is a verbal crutch to fill dead space while you collect the components you need to articulate your next line of actual speech – making an “oops” face signals to those watching that you are alert and handling this bumpy moment and carrying on through it.
This is soOOOooOooOoo important to have been avoided in this Apple presentation. The “I Love Lucy” style “wuh-oh!” face would have been the main image and preview icon for every story covering this flub – and there were a lot of those – which would have been a PR disaster for Apple.
Notable examples of this:
President George W. Bush after cutting short a Q&A for a quick exit, realizes he is trying to open a locked door:
Presidential Candidate John McCain realizing he went the wrong direction exiting the stage at the end of the 3rd 2008 Debate:
Federighi should be awarded a special acknowledgement within the company for this step alone. Again – the impulse to do a cartoony facial reaction is automatic, so it’s a commendable self-awareness and poise that controls stoicism in the face of a goof-up in front of an audience.
HE DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING DAMNING
While the initial reports savaged Apple for the mishap and continued to be unflattering even after the information trickled in on exactly what went wrong – there is no embarrassing quote to headline the reports. No “oh crap” or “wuh-oh” or “listen folks, not everyone’s perfect!” or anything that – yes – would have patched over the awkward spotlight of intensity on Federighi’s shoulders, but immediately and forever after would have been a marketing scar on the company he was repping that would live in the ages forever.
A TEACHABLE MOMENT…
Everything Federighi did was the opposite of this clip of Windows 98 crashing in a similar live demo presentation which went viral in the dial-up-internet days of the late 90s that I still remember vividly and knew I would easily find on YouTube today (which, sure enough, it wasn’t hard to track down).
The reaction of the other guy in the Windows clip though is everything lacking in the Apple failure – while Windows dude audibly, physically, and verbally (*and understandably, I might add) leaned into the embarrassing nature of the situation as a way to diffuse it and while sheepishly grinning, pantomimed his way out of the awkwardness – Federighi calmly carried through his situation with no “uuuh”s or verbal acknowledgements of there being a big problem.
In a terribly difficult scenario, he did all the right moves that made him and the company he was representing look the best it possibly could, and he should be commended and emulated.
Apple announced stuff. Here is that stuff and what it means.
THE STEVEN JOBS THEATER – a nice tribute to the late Apple founder
First event to be held on the Apple Park campus in the 1,000 seat theater named after the dude who started the company and then came back to make it what it is today.
I would have done it differently, but who cares. Thought the extended voice-over with no visuals was more odd than it was tributary but it was all nice enough. Technically, the Steve Jobs Theater was the first new product unveiled at this event.
Now on to the stuff you can buy:
APPLE WATCH 3 – Cellular data option and a heart monitor feature
LTE on Apple Watch is $10 addition to existing cell plan. that’s just approachable enough for me to not dismiss it out of hand and also ridiculous enough for me to scoff. It’s cool to be able to have a device on your wrist that can communicate with satellites and not need the proximity of another device to get data to it but I don’t see a user outside of athletes that would use the feature. A runner, swimmer, surfer, or sport team member training Rocky style who wants to be able to receive calls and/or listen to music while doing their activity without having their phone on them makes sense but virtually no other scenario outside of sport activity is imaginable to me. Apple also announced that the watch will monitor your heart and notify its wearer of any cardiac arrhythmia. Also, the digital crown is a red dot for some reason now instead of the same metalic covering as the rest of the watch.
APPLE TV – Now with 4K (and nothing else added)
Notice the difference between the image above and the previous Apple TV? Thats because there isn’t one. Same exact body, same exact remote, and it has the same exact software. No big crime I guess. Underwhelming for something I think should be a much bigger focus by Apple but the current device is suitable enough and the addition of 4k video is… something… to some people. Makes me feel better about buying my parents an Apple TV two weeks ago, knowing this new version with 4k and who-knows-what-other-upgrades would be announced. I needed to get them to cord-cut their cable service before the next billing cycle so I had to buy it and was pre-annoyed that a new model was coming out in just a couple weeks, but today Apple announced the only new thing in the next version of the device is that it supports 4K video. They, nor I, have a 4K display, so this is a non-feature for us.
iPHONE 8 – Wireless charging & it’s a little faster and takes better pictures
The iPhone & iPhone 8+ look much like the 7. It’s got a faster processor (A11 chip they’re calling “Bionic” that has six cores) and better camera (same megapixels as its predecessor but now has a new sensor with optical stabilization), as every new iPhone does. The iPhone 8 Plus will have a better more powerful camera with a dual sensor so it looks like I’ll be shelling out $800 for one of those ($700 for the regular 8). Wireless charging is the only other discernable feature anyone would probably care about. Just enough to make the new product an unexciting but desired upgrade.
iPHONE X – Same as iPhone 8 but a bigger screen & face ID instead of fingerprint ID
Steve Jobs would end his presentations with “one more thing” and then announce something cool and that’s what Apple was mirroring when they announced “one more thing” and revealed the iPhone X, which Apple pronounces as 10 (“ten”), not “ex” (same as their OSX operating system). There’s no more home button, dashing my concept that the new Apple Park campus building’s “spaceship” design was intended to represent a giant home button – which it still may well have been since it was designed when both Steve Jobs and the home button were alive and planning to go on living for awhile – and instead unlocks by scanning your face since there is no more fingerprint pad, as the screen is borderless.
The camera appears to be the same as the iPhone 8 with a double vertical sensor of 12 megapixels but something slightly different about “optical stabilization”. As reported in leaks and rumors before the announcement, the new phone will be a thousand bucks. $300 more than the iPhone 8 just for facial recognition instead of fingerprint scan and a borderless screen? I can pass on both since neither feature is particularly attractive to me.
I’ve been a long time admirer of the Nest thermostat that I first got for my mother a couple years ago and then one for myself last year. It’s a pretty metallic ring with a nice circular screen that dials temperature up and down and/or connects with its own app on your other devices or your account on Nest.com to have actions performed from wherever you are.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L8TkhHgkBsg
Then the company came out with this smoke detector, which is cool, but needs to do more than it does (which is just allow silencing by motion and monitoring levels by phone). I want to see surveillance models of all their products (same version but with cameras inside to view your rooms), too.
Anyway: It was formed by an ex Apple employee, reeks of Apple design (which is a pleasant smell) and just has Apple written all over it. I’ve been waiting for Apple to make a damn offer and open up a whole series of house products that connect with the forever-upcoming Apple Television Set and others. For some reason, Apple wasn’t interested and Google stepped in instead. $3.2 Billion later, Nest becomes a Google company.
While Apple, Google, and Microsoft dominate PCs, mobile devices, and car consoles, no company has taken control of the house yet. The connected home has long been tech giants’ white whale of every tech giant; nearly every Silicon Valley player, from HP to Dell to Intel, has detailed its vision for the future of the connected home. But the fantastical future vision videos created over the years have amounted to nothing more than impressive displays of CGI–Nest, on the other hand, has actually started to execute on the promise of the connected home by creating a standard protocol for the house. If Nest is able to get there first, it’ll force other future players to build on its platform–if anyone wants to make some connected smart refrigerator or TV or toilet, the devices will have to speak Nest’s language. That’s the kind of leverage that could make Nest (and now Google) a major player in the industry.
“From the beginning, our vision was to create a conscious home. A home that is more thoughtful, intuitive–and nice to look at. No one had cracked the code and we were confident we could do it with the right product, the right team, and focus,” Fadellwrote today in a blog post. “Google will help us fully realize our vision of the conscious home and allow us to change the world faster than we ever could if we continued to go it alone.”
Perhaps the more compelling part of the deal is acquiring Fadell‘s talent. One of the most prominent characters in the Valley, Fadell helped usher in the mobile era at Apple before leaving to start Nest. Arguably more than any other Apple veteran, Fadell has built his startup with an Apple-like DNA, infusing Nest’s products with a strong sense of design, brand, and purpose. It’s certainly a huge coup for Google, one of Apple’s fiercest rivals. (Apple was reportedly not a potential bidder, whereas Google Ventures, the company’s investment arm, has long been an investor in Nest.)
As part of deal, according to Google’s statement, Nest will continue to “operate under the leadership of Tony Fadell and with its own distinct brand identity.”
UPDATE: Walter Isaacson, Steve Jobs’ biographer says on CNBC that Tim Cook is vulnerable and his deal with China takes a back seat as far as big-deals go to Google’s gobble of Nest:
Meanwhile, Apple’s marketing chief Phil Schiller unfollowed Nest CEO and the Nest company on Twitter. At first glance it may sound like petty high school popularity politicking, but it actually shows the reality that Nest is an Apple enemy now. I don’t get why Apple didn’t want to buy this company and why they didn’t. It makes no sense to me.
As the protector of Apple’s brand, Schiller’s unfollowing of Fadell and Nest is perhaps unsurprising. With the Nest deal, a source says that Google will gain approximately 200 former Apple employees. The majority of Nest employees worked at Apple over the course of their careers, with many being involved in high-profile projects like the iPod, iPad, and iPhone. The design of the Nest Thermostat and Nest Protect have also been compared to the designs of Apple products, so the fact that Nest’s products are now under the umbrella of Apple’s fiercest competitor may not be a pleasing sight for Apple’s marketing head.
This is not the first time that Schiller has publicly taken the stand against Google products. The Apple veteran has blasted Google and its partners on Twitter for issues ranging from hardware benchmark claims to mobile operating system security. Schiller’s practice of taking small jabs at competitors also goes beyond Google. For a couple of years, the then-exclusive-to-iOS Instagram app was heavily promoted both on the App Store and by Phil Schiller. After Instagram expanded its business to the Android platform, Schiller closed his Instagram account.
So, just like I told you, Apple is turning its iPod Nano into a new wearable device coming soon. Given Apples history with these things, I predict it will be cool but fall way way short of its potential.
It’s unlikely any of this will actually be in version 1, but my 100% technologically and business-wise possible wish list is as follows. From my mouth to Jobs ears… Here’s what Apple could do to make this product tha bomb dot com:
1- Make it WATERPROOF.
Not water “Resistant” to where it can get splashed – iPhones are already that. They don’t advertise as such, but I’ve taken mine on enough boats and in enough oceans, lakes, pools, hot tubs and bath tubs to know that it can handle some spritz and even moisture (minimal, obvs) in the headphone jack and Lightning-butthole. The only iPhone I killed with water was Brenda1 – my first generation iPher in 2008 when my group stayed out on an offshore Hawaiian island too long and the tide came in and was rough so the swim back was equally rough, causing our waterproof bags to — whatever. The point is that a smart watch that doesn’t need to be removed in water is how to make watches a thing again. I used to love my old waterproof Fossil a girlfriend bought me back in the day to keep track of how many hours I was out in the waves and whatnot. Phones should be waterproof but I get why the care and expense isn’t taken to make them so. Theres no excuse for watches. Especially a smart watch. We already have an electronic thingy that we have to remove from our person before we go wake boarding. We don’t need another. A waterproof iWatch is how Apple can truly keep us connected with something actually useful: Get Facebook, Twitter and other notifications with you while in the pool. Don’t cut your surf session short waiting for a call – just check your wrist for important texts and incoming calls to tell you when you need to hustle back ashore. This is the #1 need for this device. All it would mean is wireless charging for the device – which is not a big deal but for some reason Apple doesn’t use that technology anywhere. The iWatch might be the first wireless charging device Apple finally releases though since there really is no sensible way to add power to a wearable device conveniently and in keeping with the minimalist Apple esthetic. And I’m not even talking about the electricity wifi that I invented and was laughed at for claiming was possible in 2001 – I just mean a charging dock with no plug-in. My tooth brush uses it. Why can’t apple? Their wireless mice should at least use it (with double-A recharbales inside that can be replaced with regulars if you choose) but doesn’t. Make the watch waterproof and that alone will get me to buy it.
2- Make it talk to other Apple products.
This is your chance to make being in the Apple cult really pay off, Apple. Wtf is wrong with you for letting Samsung punk you on that cool “bump phones to share a picture” feature? How was that not an Apple thing, you dummies? Especially when this iTV monster finally comes out after 4 years of developing – you’re gonna have to blend your shiz better. I want my iWatch to pause and play my iTV so I essentially have a remote with me at all times and I want it to know when I’m in the vicinity of my other Apple children so it can do things like log me into my computer without making me type in my password every time.
3- Make it loud AND make it silent.
Up until now, watches just beep and chirp at you. Apple has a chance to re-invent this product that’s been stuck in the 1980s for 20 years and give people a Walkman on their wrist and instead of calling it the iWatch – call it the iBand and make use of the play on words since you’ll have a music band within a wrist band. Put a speaker in this thing. Let me listen to a podcast or music playlist with the sound coming from my arm instead of a device in my pocket. That combined with its waterproof feature would make the watch fantastically unique.
For alerts, alarms and other messages: Morse code them to me with vibrations. You put your phone on vibrate and it still makes a loud “JZZZ JZZZ” sound. Put your iBand on silent and it subtly notifies you that you have something you might want to give attention to and finding out what it is not a cumbersome hassle of digging for your phone or retrieving it across the room just to see what has popped up on the screen – it’s as simple as glancing at your time telling device (which is perfectly socially acceptable in almost any instance outside of Presidential debate and other moments where you might be considered inapropes for waiting for whatever is going on to be over).
4- Make it a wallet.
Apple is inching towards this with it’s built in Passbook app that stores boarding passes, coupons, movie tickets, gift cards and more. Put it on the wrist. Eventually, I’d like to pay for my milkshake with money on my credit card by booping my wrist on a device in front of a register and getting an electronic receipt logging my purchase right away – but until then, I’ll just settle for paying for that milkshake with a gift card stored in my iBand the same way I can do now with Passbook on my iPhone. Put it on the wrist and give people one less thing they have to hold in their hand and dig in their pockets for. It’s the way of the future.
5- OBVIOUSLY open it up to the App Store
It’s really dumb that the Apple TV has existed for so many years and STILL doesn’t (and may never) allow 3rd parties to make apps for it outside of special deals made with Apple itself. Slowly, new features have been introduced to the device like Hulu Plus and a bunch of sports bullshit (baseball and basketball video streaming or something? Idk. I’ve never explored the icons) but it needs so much more. I assume this is Apple just holding back until their actual TV comes out in a million years to give it a bigger bang, make sure it works exactly how they want it to and that there aren’t conflicts of interest with their other products but it’s still lame. The iBand needs apps right away. I love the idea of having a hand-watch (which I’ve lost the ability to read) and a digital watch in the same device that is a tap away from switching back and forth in full-screen and I love the idea of being able to swipe left and right to see the local time vs time @ my destination I might be traveling to vs time in Kandahar – but that shiz is just the beginning. Make your watch a Mickey Mouse watch – put some screen savers on it that could be conversation starters – turn the screen stark-white to make it a makeshift flashlight – let me run the far superior (and free) Run Tracker exercise app on it instead of Nike’s super lame built-in iOs app that requires an external $30 device on your shoe – OPEN this thing up and it. can. Be. Awesommmmme.
These features are necessary, awesome and most of all: useful by being not redundant (ie: they achieve better ways to do things than currently exist even in other Apple products like the iPhone or any version of the iPod).
I rarely ask these closer questions (cuz it’s almost always just a cheap gimmick by authors to get viewers interactive) but I really wanna know: What do you want in the upcoming Apple-wrist-product?
The iOS 5 update from October 2011 introduced the following issues that have yet to be fixed:
1 The playback speed control for podcasts has gone
2 Chapter support in audiobooks has gone
3 The 30 second rewind button for podcasts has gone
4 Customizable menu so podcasts and audiobooks can be moved to the front page
5 Podcast count–You now have to open each podcast “folder” to see the number of unplayed podcasts
6 Time elapsed/remaining–used to be able to look at a podcast/audiobook and determine how far along you were. Now it has to be the active track.
7 Link to more episodes has gone
Please give us back these useful features and address the bug(s). iOS 5 is exciting but for podcasts on the iPad it is a great disappointment, and very unworthy of Apple.
This is the biggest fail I’ve ever experienced with Apple. This is Microsoft Windows level of wait time for something that desperately needs attention.
iOS 5 for the iPad plays audio books and podcasts at half the speed with no way to change it. You’re supposed to have half, normal and 2x options.
FINALLY an update was released. and it addressed a bunch of bullshit that isn’t nearly as important. Thanks for that..
